Thursday, November 20, 2008

Rejoice with those who rejoice


Sometimes the hardest part of singleness is not the waiting.

No one enjoys waiting. If you're anything like me, you prefer to wait very little for anything. Patience is a hard virtue to learn. But despite the difficulty of waiting, I think there is something that can be harder.

Rejoicing. Not just rejoicing.

Rejoicing with those who rejoice.

We love camaraderie. We love having friends who can empathize with us, and link their arms through ours with the understanding that they are in the same place and we are not alone. This is especially true for those who've been single several years. We like being in the same position. We like the knowledge that we aren't the only one left.

And then it happens. Your friend meets someone. They court. They get engaged. They marry.

Oh of course you're happy for them--you're supposed to be. After all, they would be that way for you. You're fine with it, really. The wedding was lovely. And now they're off to their honeymoon.

While you go back to.........where you still are. Single. And deep down, it feels a little unfair. You're back to "square one".

My friends, let's be honest--haven't we all felt this way before? Haven't we all said "Hey, so happy for you!" while inside we're thinking But I wish it was me!

This is where rejoicing with those who rejoice becomes hard. When they have something you want.

I'm convinced in my own life that I really don't let the truth of Romans 8:28 sink down into my being as it should. I am called according to God's purpose. He chose to create a purpose for me, a sinner. For His glory. Not mine. For His purpose. Not mine.

How it must grieve my Lord when I spend more time fussing over the purpose He's given to someone else, rather than seeking the purpose He's created for me.
Rejoicing with those who rejoice means realizing that my life is not happening as it is by mistake. God is not rewarding so and so because they "did it right".
He is moving their life elsewhere according to the purpose He has for them.
And I am not where I am because I "did it wrong".
I am where I am because God is fulfilling His purpose in my life, for His glory.
It should be exciting to us, to know that we are part of His plan! Celebrate!
You are not single by mistake. God is preparing you for the next part of your purpose, whatever it may be. Rejoicing is more than being happy for someone.
Rejoicing is praising the Lord because He is faithfully directing their lives to fulfill His plans.

So rather than bemoan when someone moves in the direction you're wishing for, smile!
God is at work in both of your lives--to fulfill the purposes He has called you to.

And you haven't gotten lost in the shuffle.

4 comments:

Kristi November 20, 2008 at 1:02 PM  

Excellent post! I am guilty as the next girl when it came to "rejoicing with those who rejoice" before I got married. It is truly a blessed place to be in when you can unreservedly rejoice.

Ana November 20, 2008 at 6:37 PM  

Thank you. Words fail me right now ... it's just what I needed to hear ... or rather read ... thank you.

kalipay November 20, 2008 at 7:42 PM  

This somewhat similar post on YLCF has been an encouragement to me as I've gone through a courtship and hesitated to chatter on about my experiences because she was still very unattached...

So please, you who are courting/in relationships, don't stop talking about it. Don't stop sharing your joy. Don't stop posting pictures. It's one way that the Lord reminds us of the hope that we have for our future romances, done the right way.

http://blog.ylcf.org/2006/02/message-from-one-single-sister-to.html

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