Saying something encouraging...

The challenge that goes with writing something encouraging for single girls is coming up with something that hasn't already been said.  There are plenty of encouraging websites and books out there for us.  There are even plenty of encouraging friends in the same situation if you know where to look (hint, hint, IDD) :) 

But, I think we've all been to the place where the same old, same old phrases e.g. "God will bring the right man, just have patience." "Being single is a gift, it's a time to serve the Lord in a way you won't be able to once you are married." just sound trite at times.  Like, the times when we're being strong, really being strong, and a commercial on TV or a song we hear brings tears to our eyes and a sudden familiar longing. 

Or, maybe you've had the "wedding blues."  You know the ones?  When your friend or relative is getting married, and they're SO happy.  And you're so happy for them, too.  And you help with the planning and the wedding and you do everything you can, but when they walk down the aisle, you cry.  Not for joy.  For loneliness.  Because you feel like you're losing a friend.  Because at the end of the day your friend has a better friend.  And you go home alone.

I've been there.  Lots of times.  I go home and cry out to the Lord "Lord, if marriage isn't what you want for me, PLEASE take the desire away.  Make me content with my future alone."  I've said it many times.  And I meant it every single time.  In fact, every single time I've meant it even more than the last time. 

But, you know what?  He never took it away.  And you know what else?  THAT is more encouraging to me than anything sometimes.  That He didn't take that desire away.  Which means He must want me to have it.  I think that means He's going to fill it. 

So, now I'm praying for patience.

-Rebecca

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Solitude

I love my solitude. I love to be able to work and think without interruption.
It's a time of peace and rest for me.
Growing up in a large family I learned to crave time alone
like a rare and precious gift to be looked on as the jewel it is.
Certainly not to be misspent or wasted.

But sometimes I get lonely.
Sometimes, early in the morning
when I look at the day stretched out in front of me...
I feel like something important is missing.
Or, when I have a mini personal victory,
or a mini personal defeat
and I want to tell somebody who might understand.

I'm happy with my life.
Content.
I love my family and friends.
But, just because I'm happy does that mean
I can't look forward to the future?

Does that mean that sometimes,

when I'm quiet,
I shouldn't admit that
something is missing?

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The "+1" Dilemna

It came in the mail. One of those darling crisp white envelopes that come sometimes. You know the ones? They have pretty handwriting on the front, and when you see it you say “Oh! I wonder if this is…” and then you flip it over and get the answer to your question “It is!! Oooohhhh!”

This is not the kind of envelope you tear open. Nope. You have to find your letter opener thingamajig, and slit the top. Then you open it up. And then you open it up again…. And there it is… “To: Rebecca, and Guest” *AHEM* yes…. There it is. That inevitable “+1.”

AH! The frustration!!! Not only is some lucky girl (not you) getting married, she’s asking you to bring a “guest.” I’m sure you know the feeling. Awkward.

Do you go alone? Drag along a family member? Find a friend to go with you? And then there’s the double awkwardness of being at the wedding without a “significant other.” Almost worse than going alone, going with your sister and then it’s painfully obvious to anyone who cares to wonder that you are most definitely single. As single as the day is long. Ouch.

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